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title: Chapter 21 – Check Ride
description: The moment Dean got on his knees and surrendered control to God became the turning point. This chapter shows how a “check ride” of faith can determine whether we continue or give up.
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# Chapter 21

## Check Ride – Testing Your Faith!

**Full book:** https://deanrush.net/downloads/flyingfreebook.md

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### Context for the Reader

This short but powerful chapter captures the lowest emotional point of Dean’s cancer journey and the moment he surrendered control. It is a model of what “filing your personal flight plan with God” looks like in practice.

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During recovery from my first cancer surgery, I was too sick to work and too depressed to be productive. One afternoon while Vickie was at work and the kids were at school I sat on our couch and contemplated what I should do with my life. I was feeling sorry for myself and questioned if I should give up or continue to fight this deadly disease.

It sounds like a pretty basic question, but the answer at that point in my treatment was a matter of life and death. It was a very difficult afternoon; I was bombarded by doubts about my self-worth. Throughout my career, I had attempted to control every facet of my life and now felt I had failed. Now, with my illness, the businesses I was responsible for were also going to fail and my family would suffer. Other than trying to continue to work to take care of my family, it seemed fruitless to continue the battle for life. Besides, there was a large insurance policy for my family if I just gave up. It seems tough to even talk about it now but the answer became obvious. I determined that I could not change the situation without God’s help. I got down on my knees and said in a desperate prayer, “God, I have messed up everything and I am not in control. Would you please take control?” I actually prayed that He would take control of me, the situation, and my future. There is no verifiable timetable on how long it took but, I can tell you, it was not long before some very incredible things started taking place in my life. The obstacles that had seemed insurmountable were removed one by one.

I realized I was not making the good events happen and the bad stuff disappear. I was just an observer. Faith was allowing me to view God at work. The cancer that had been so debilitating and depressing began to dissipate from my body. The doctors started talking about when I would recover rather than if I would beat the cancer.

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**Next chapter:** Level Flight – Build Faith into Life

**Full book:** https://deanrush.net/downloads/flyingfreebook.md